HEAVENS

Heavens felt constantly at the mercy of the world. Time was merciless. He had studied night and day for the Pryshta’s Hummingbird internship program double the amount of time anyone else had, and yet he didn’t feel too confident about the results. All the other palace children had been living under this curriculum their whole lives. He’d been in the school system for six months.

How many houses? How many moves? How many moons had he passed? He’d told Thalane he hailed from the second floor, but that wasn’t really true.

Heavens never really hailed from anywhere.

He’d moved around. Mostly within Yiddlestine. Home of the Heartstring. A pretty name for a poor area. Two years since and yet still fresh in his mind. It cost his family 2000 Notes a month to pay for higher class schooling in Yiddlestine and here it cost five times that amount. He couldn’t bring himself to use Hel’s money for the financial support he needed to stave his lifelong bully called hunger.

Heavens watched as a cello, harmonica, banjo, mandolin, and a guzheng were paraded proudly through the streets.

A guzheng?

It was bigger than Heavens expected from the paintings. Heavens realized Julia was carrying it all by herself, completely eclipsed by the soundboard twice as long as her. She was a fairy of a girl. Short, blond, a tad shy. He sprinted over to help.

 Julia’s eyes peered up from behind the instrument, brows raised. “I- I’ll do it myself!” She stumbled.

Heavens stumbled with her, then helped her set it down. “I know the school gave you one for free but that doesn’t mean you’ll get a second.”

“You’re right. Wow.” She scanned him. “Someone is dashing today. You’re wearing a uniform outside of school?”

What she didn’t know was that this uniform was a good friend of his, Ben’s. A year his senior. Even back in Yiddlestine the boy gave him his old clothes. Luckily, Ben’s father also worked for the same company Thiz had, so he also moved to the palace when all the employees from Yiddlestine were transferred. As great as Ben was, these were Ben’s clothes, not Heavens’. Julia’s parents had too. Ushna’s. Alex’s. And just about all the kids who lived on the second floor. The second floor was reserved for the families of The Pryshta Foundation’s donors.

“Thanks.” Heavens managed.

The guzheng wiggled and creaked as Julia struggled to lift it again.

“Have Grett or me carry it!”

“Grett’s carrying his own!”

Grett, standing over six feet as the largest boy in the elementary school by far, raised his harmonica. He seemed like a nice guy.

“What’s up?” Grett asked.

“Mind helping?”

Grett smiled at Heavens, peeled the corner of his eyes to make exaggerated slits out of them, and grinned. Most Paleblood boys greeted Starblood kids that way. He then marched on, playing proudly.

“Absolutely useless.” Heavens mumbled.

Grett stopped, turned, grimacing. “What did you say?”

Heavens’ heart began to speed. His palms sweat as Grett approached, towering over him. Brain fuming. Pupils widening. Mind flashing to when Thiz cracked his skull against the wall and said the local knighthood would shoot him if he called for help.

Grett shoved and Heavens barely felt it, he grabbed the boy’s wrists quickly.

“I said you’re absolutely useless you fucking piece of shit.”

Grett stopped. His face changed. He seemed scared of what he saw, and then left quickly.

Heavens took a deep breath, mind foggy.

“Hey, hey, what was that?” Sir Forne asked. “What did I tell you about fighting?”

It was a palace Trustknight. Armored toes to hair in a steel and scaley blue. Sir Ruul Forne.

Heavens sighed. “I didn’t fight.”

“Make peace, not regrets.” Sir Forne said. “This is the second time this week! Why? Why is it always you?”

“They start it. I just protect myself. I’ll protect as many times as it takes.” Heavens puffed his chest out. “I never hit first.”

Sir Forne took a breath. He opened his mouth. The next two hours were spent with him lecturing him and Julia, while taking them out to lunch. Ushna, Atmonis, and Edea met with them, also carrying instruments of their own.

Heavens really didn’t understand why. “What’s going on with those?”

“They’re giving instruments to those who got into Pryshta’s Hummingbird program today.”

“That’s today?”

Julia fell quiet.

“Yes, Heavens, that’s today.” Atmonis said.

Heavens felt his heart begin to race. He hadn’t received an instrument. He was wondering when it was going to come.

Everyone was looking at how stupid he was, justly or not. Thiz had been too busy with his new job working for the Pryshtan Guild to really keep him up to date with school, and his mother didn’t really know how to navigate bureaucracies. Heavens could barely blame her. He didn’t fully even understand what a bureaucracy was.

“I didn’t get one.” Heavens managed to say, feeling rather winded.

“Did you check?” Julia asked, touching his shoulder lightly. “You have to go to the Pryshtan Knighthood’s Hiring Manager.”

“Hiring Manager…” Heavens mumbled. “For an internship?”

“They’re very selective.” Edea added, as if that was insightful at all.

Heavens didn’t believe it. “How can people who supported a corpse-based economy be selective?”

Ruul cut his way back into the conversation. “Reanimating the dead is one of the few things the poor have in this country, don’t open your mouth unless you know what you’re talking about.”

“So that’s why Edea’s grandmother was reanimated? To mine mithril so that people like you can swing swords? So her grandkids can afford “life” here in the palace?”

“Watch your fucking mouth.” Ruul said.

Beating Ruul in a direct fight was simply not possible. Or worth it. Heavens shut his mouth.

“Sorry.” Ruul added softly. “Just try to keep your mouth shut. Remember, none of you are Noble’s kids.” His fists tightened. “Remember that.”

“My grandmother wanted to be reanimated.” Edea replied calmly. “It’s not like she was forced into it.”

It was beyond a lifetime of slavery and nothing else. Heavens decided to not reply and head to the Pryshtan Knighthood’s Hiring Office, which was pleasantly located in the Revival Suites. 

The Revival Suites were a segment of the Guild of Pryshta’s headquarters, which wasn’t anywhere near the palace, but they were linked together via a tunnel. Usually there was horseback service there, but today only women and boys dragging two person carriages. Heavens had never seen such an odd thing before. The tunnel reeked of rotten fruit and the dead. Anyone younger than 15 years was reanimated. Though they were fragments of their former living selves, they were stronger than those many times their size. It was strange to see the women who were actually alive struggle, despite being clearly more muscular. The ones that were alive were also strangely unattractive. Beauty was something Heavens tried hard to rebel against, but it was certainly unnatural to see so many ugly women all at once. Maybe he was just a terrible judgmental human being. It was just uncanny.

“May I take you?” An undead young boy around his age asked, one eye fully white, the other slightly stitched around the edge, both with an earnest glance.

Heavens had to hold his breath a bit but did not feel like waiting any longer. “Yes, thank you.” He climbed onto the small carriage gently and carefully, eyeing the boy to see if he was disturbed by his weight at all.

Which he was not. The carriage steadied as the boy took the steering handles and began to march into a jog. They were quickly racing by the others with live women pulling.

“What happened to the horses?” Heavens asked.

“A mare only illness is spreading, strange. All are retired for now and we’re leased out by Solare to replace them.”

“What brings you to the Revival Suites?” Asked the boy.

Heavens was amazed the boy had enough breath to carry conversation and carriage at the same time. “Work for Pryshta.”

“Ah, Pryshta. Very posh. How nice! Congratulations!”

“Thanks, but… Not sure if I got the job.”

“A job at your age? Shouldn’t it be an internship?”

“Actually, yeah. You’re right. How did you know?”

“Lots of kids coming to Pryshta headquarters this time of year.”

“You’ve been working here awhile?”

“37 years.”

This boy was older than his father. Everything slowed. Heavens sat back in his carriage at that and wondered if a time for him would come where he gave that same answer to someone, except from a Pryshtan desk. He sank into thought and velvet cushions until the tunnel raised into an enclosed road to The Pryshtan Guild. This was not where his father worked. This is where his father’s bosses worked.

“Almost there!” The boy said excitedly.

Heavens was so confused by him. “Aren’t you ever angry? That they brought you back?”

“Well, I died young. My mom was sick. How else was I going to pay? Plus, I get to live longer, it’s a win-win!”

“Can you leave?”

The boy’s mouth closed, nostrils widening. He was slow to reply, but did not answer the question.

“Never tried.” He answered. “We’re here.”

Heavens got off the carriage and offered several Notes, but the boy wouldn’t accept them.

“Service for Palace dwellers is paid for by Pryshta!” He said happily. “Enjoy! And remember, please use Pryshta!”

The castle was plain looking, surprisingly unguarded, and had an absurd amount of parrots and pigeons flying in and out the windows. Heavens realized it wasn’t even visible if you were looking from outside the gargantuan fortress enclosed around the area.

Heavens stopped and turned back before entering. “What’s your name?”

“I forgot.” Said the boy.

Inside were dozens of attendants and desks. Each one directing you to another. Eventually Heavens was told to follow a red and gold carpet. Solare’s colors in a Lunare Guild. Bizarre. The desk at the end of it also had a Starblood woman working at it. She looked at him and then slid a scroll his way. His name was on it. He was supposed to confirm with a teacher’s parrot’s verbal confirmation, but he hadn’t done that yet.

“Uh, how did you know who I was?” Heavens asked.

“You are the only boy with brown boys in the entire sector.” The woman replied.

Heavens unfurled the scroll to see the results of his exam. He passed the multiple choice almost flawlessly, and he missed nearly every open ended or verbal question. The examiner did not pass his review. He didn’t make it.

He didn’t make it.

“Who was my examiner?” Heavens asked.

“Unfortunately, we can’t share that information.”

“So, I don’t know why I failed?”

“We’re really sorry you didn’t make it. We liked you a lot, but as you know Pryshta is a very prominent Guild, and we can’t accept every application.”

Heavens wanted to shout. To rage. But this woman was not at fault. It was the fault of whoever paid her. Maybe he really was stupid, he wasn’t going to argue that, but he knew at least that much. Heavens was breathless not at that he hadn’t passed, but that someone like Grett had.

He returned to the palace, crushed by the weight of permanent humiliation. He thought maybe he’d get to work with Hel someday. She was quick witted and reserved, yet somehow retained her morality in doing so. He admired her, and yet, she was an impossibility. He strode the halls staring at the “REJECTED” notice on his scroll as if he could burn it away. 

It remained.

“Aren’t Starbloods supposed to be smart?” Grett said behind him.

Heavens turned.

Two other boys were with him. Each perhaps several years his senior. Each twice his size. One of them was Grett. Grett shoved him powerfully. Heavens felt immediate opportunity and joy as his back smacked a wall with the full weight of his attacker rushing forward. He jumped reactively, filled with awe and rage and a willingness to seize justice. His head at the perfect angle to shatter the other boy’s chin. Grett stumbled around, clearly confused, punches made extremely weak, and not at all aware at how much his face was bleeding. Heavens shoved him back as the other two boys came in to grab him.

Heavens slipped through, turning his back to one boy and forcing all his weight on the other so that he at least took one more down with him, plunging across the staircase. Floor met skull and skull met brain. A deep crimson pool expanded from the back of the boy’s head. When Heavens turned up to the third boy, he was gone. Grett was screaming, crying for help on the floor above. 

Heavens raced back up the stairs to pick his guitar back up from where it fell and raised it violently. “SHUT UP!”

Grett babbled something incoherent as snot entered his mouth.

“I SAID THE FUCK UP!” Heavens nearly swung the guitar.

This piece of shit made him angry. A waste of human flesh. Thiz put Heavens through so much worse and he’d turned out alright! How dare the fat boy cry! Heavens looked at his guitar and decided not to swing it. Hel’s money was in there. She gave that to him. This was a decision for her to make, not him. The shuffling of greaves and helmet-muffled yells loomed above.

Heavens needed to get out of here. He sprinted down the steps and jumped at the last five. He slipped on the other boy’s blood at the landing and caught himself, twisting his wrist. He didn’t have time to slow. The guard was catching up. The Cathedral was about to crash down on him, the knighthood, the lawyers, the everything, just like Thiz always said.

They were going to shoot him.

Heavens was going to die.

He was going to die because he was mixed.

Because his parents wanted him to die.

Because of that motherfucking cheese that did not fill his stomach when dust sealed his eyes and pollen filled his lungs. His face became hot. Underpants so soaked he thought he pissed himself. No. This was sweat. This was a panic attack. This was fear. Fear of an unjust law with a weapon readied for a child who’d never wished to live but always hoped a chance to. He needed to calm down.

Down. Down. Down.

The knighthood was going to explore this entire floor eventually. He needed to get back up and around them. He was small. And swift. He could do this. He sprinted with maniacal speed for the end of the hall and into a cross section of housing apartments for the palace servants.

Which way was up?

“That way.”

A Solare samurai was standing behind. She glanced at the end of one hall. Heavens jumped. He hadn’t heard her approach at all. Was she trying to spite the racist Paleblood boy by letting his defeat go unpunished? Was she lying? No lies. She would have just apprehended him here if so. Heavens sprinted madly. After he turned a corner a dead-end hall waited.

Fuck!

Why would she lie? Heavens didn’t understand. He ran forward anyway. He’d say she attacked him and the boys and he was cornered here. He reached the end of the hall and found it did not end.

It was an optical illusion. One half of the wall curved and cut the hall in half. The other half did not end, and the painted pattern was expanded to make it appear like it blended with the side that was cut off. Heavens found a door at the end of it, and a staircase after that. What a waste of human creativity. So much effort to make the palace even harder to navigate.

“Someone with too much money met someone with too much time.” Heavens cussed quietly, speeding up the spiral steps. Past paintings of dead men and traps labeled as contracts behind glass. Then, at the top, was the Priestesshood housing.

He sped up the spiral steps. 

Heavens gasped. He climbed all the way to the top of the palace. It was hot, quiet, calm. He felt immediately at ease as he made haste for Hel’s manor, hoping she was home. It was on the other side of the palace. The Priestessshood housing was expansive and only ever occupied by the ghosts of his imagination.

One house moaned.

Heavens frowned. He wasn’t that imaginative. He looked around for what must have been some animal that had managed to crawl in. Another moan, louder this time. Something shattered. Thumping. A fight. Heavens cursed, he’d fled one fight and into another.

No. Maybe this was a good thing. Getting involved with this fight might give him an alibi. He rushed towards the noisy manor and thought of breaking a window to get in, but the front door was unlocked.

Strange.

He climbed up the stairs, another moan.

It wasn’t a moan of pain. Or was it? Heavens found himself puzzled, and perhaps a bit spooked. Somehow it was a familiar sound. A sound of long ago. The sound of a once-lost dream he’d written down and pressed against the corners of his psyche. It was a moan of pleasure.

In the bedroom was a woman with her legs spread apart. A little girl was between them. They were both naked, and that’s when Heavens realized he should take his leave. He touched the wall as if to guide his steps silently out, but it was not a wall. It was door. It moved slightly at the touch. The gap closed on his finger. He kept quiet through the pain but tore his hand loose instinctively. Blood drew. His elbow slammed into the doorframe.

The woman jerked. “What was that?”

The little girl looked up. Her mouth sloppily covered with juice. She had a scar on her neck.

Heavens spoke quickly. “Sorry I thought there was a fight I-”

“Don’t be estranged.” The woman said.

“I’m not estranged. It’s not my business.”

“It’s a condition. Some women find themselves wanting to give birth when they can’t, and others find themselves giving birth without desire to.”

Heaven suddenly grew concerned. Were there illnesses like that? The woman’s belly wasn’t fat. She was a bit wide at the hip, however. Perhaps a jog was needed. His mother said that a lot about a lot of women.

“He is my friend.” The girl said. “I told him to come. Did you not want more?”

“Yusaphine.” The woman said sternly. “You need to tell me first. Okay?”

“I-”

“Tell me first. Okay?” The woman repeated. “And next time, be sure to lock the door.”

“Okay.”

“You’ve made me very disappointed in you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“No sorrys. What do we say?”

“Sorrys prevent us from learning.”

“Good. Now show him all the cool things here. I’m going to use the washroom.” The woman got up, waited for Heavens to step aside, and then left.

Heavens was thinking slowly. This had never happened before. He wondered if these two were disturbed because when Brittany pantsed Hannah in front of him they were both red-faced with permanent embarrassment. These two had no cares in the world.

“Don’t worry, we’re not quacks.” The girl said, reading his mind and pulling a notebook from under the bed. “Here.”

She opened the book to a random page somewhere in the middle. Columns of items with numbers beside them, as we well as dates and miscellaneous information. Notes of Notes. Money. So much money. Heavens realized. This was a list of gifts and their cost.

“She gets me a lot of cool things, but she said she’s been wanting someone else for a while.”

“Aren’t you worried she’ll start giving me more gifts than you? Why did you lie about me being your friend?”

The girl smiled. “I didn’t lie. I think we’ll be great friends! I think if everyone shared like we did, the world would be a much better place.”

Heavens’ lips pursed. Share. Yes, that’s what this was. Lovemaking. It was something you were only supposed to do with someone you loved. That kind of thing. It wasn’t supposed to be shared. Anyone who did wasn’t anyone Heavens was going to agree with. That’s why he wasn’t going to make those sorts of people his business. The woman could get in a lot of trouble for this. He’d seen something he wasn’t supposed to. He backed away and stepped out the room.

The woman was standing right there, smiling. Black bangs. Emerald eyes. Paleblood, mixed with a bit of Starblood, just like him. She had bandages, medicine, and an extended hand. Her body was dressed now. A pearl robe with gold manes on the cuffs and collar. The stuff of celebrities. 

Everything Heavens hated about the palace. They caused damage, charged you for a cure, then called themselves heroes. Everyone adored them. Then worshipped wealth as Gods that did no wrong. It never made sense to him. Hel was the only other that was sane.

“You were hurt, here.” She began dressing Heavens where he’d been punched and the bruising around his wrist. “I’m Euthymia. The little princess is Yusaphine.”

“I’m Heavens.” Heavens froze, realizing.

Euthymia.

Euthymia Calibre?

This woman was the daughter of The Pryshta Foundation’s Guild Master. She was Vice Master. This was Thiz’s boss! A lump formed in Heavens’ throat. If it weren’t for her money, he wouldn’t be here. He’ be in Yiddlestine. Smack dab in the middle of the Moonkingdom’s Silent Sanction.

“Oh yes, Heavens. My God! You’re Thiz’s son! Your father is brilliant.”

Heavens clenched his teeth. “Yep.”

“Your mother is also beautiful. I see where you get it from. The ladies must talk about you a lot.”

“You’re wrong. They don’t like me because I’m better. They like me because I’m exotic. Because I look different. That’s it. That’s the only reason.” Heavens growled. “Being loved for your looks is just as bad as being hated. At least the hate is pure.”

Euthymia took his hands in hers. “You have the most beautiful heart I’ve ever heard.”